the muscle must relax before it can steadily hold a position
the mind must realize the vast space of possibilities before it can choose
but to the outsider it looks the same
is there a difference? yes there is, the objective part is the choice to hold a position, the subjective part is the realization of the vast space out there
people mistake the feeling of obsession for love, but it is the relaxation before the choice that gives love its essence
the feeling of obsession is real for sure, but if it must be called “love” also, then i would accept that the word “love” linguistically has two meanings, one often used as the feeling of obsession in romantic relationships, the other being a more spiritual but less “feel-y” kind.
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the realization of the vast space of possibilities can be called freedom. because we had all these choices and we did choose something, so in this sense true freedom leads to true love.
the interesting thing is that this is all internal and subjective, from the outside it is difficult if not impossible to tell whether somebody had this realization or not. their objective situation is often not objectively better than anyone, after all it’s expected that people generally make the same choices whether they are aware of vast non-preferable possibilities or not. but it may be speculated that the free person owns their decisions and they generally make better ones, and they probably occasionally make apparently super weird decisions that confuse others, which generally turn out ok. but otherwise this revelation is internal.
so in a non intuitive sense the ability of a person to imagine non-preferable choices or even realities make the current one so much better. yet a weird observation is that the person who keeps imagining supposedly more preferable possibilities generally are less happy. the solution is not to keep thinking about disasters, but to expand one’s imagination, and actually do take the preferred possibilities that can be chosen. the ones that cannot be chosen for any reason are not possibilities(???) so as i imagine now it is probably better to focus on the ones that are “possible. however here we introduce so called unchosen possibilities and unchoosable possibilities- is there really a difference? the only difference is the point of self knowledge- the unchosen possibility is not taken because the self that has chosen has rejected it but the self that has not yet chosen has not yet done so, the unchoosable possibility is not taken because both selves have rejected it. this sounds weird from the common objective truth perspective but there is actually no difference in the kind of impossibility between the self rejecting something due to having chosen something and the thing being “physically impossible “, because one the self rejects some choice it is physically impossible for it to happen, eg if i have actually rejected going to a party , then it is physically impossible for you to find me going there (without being held against my will). the confusion here is that most people actually don’t “decide”- they hold out (or they don’t actually know their decision). perhaps one will change their mind - but then that means that they have not really made a decision yet. as such making decisions and knowing that one has made a decision is a much more “powerful” kind than the normal decisions. i think they are generally quantatively different though and so far as decisions are 99+% they are probably supposed to have similar effect.
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